Let the paper pregnancy begin!

Well yesterday was a big day for the Coffey bar. We officially passed in our application to start the adoption process. I guess the term some people use is that they are so many month paper pregnant. Apparently some people think it's offensive but I think it sounds appropriate. I have come to understand that this "gestation period" could be as long and as graceful as a pregnant elephant .

What the heck did we just sign up for!?

So we actually got the application about 3 weeks ago. I had contacted the dcf for information early in November. I then ran home every afternoon to wait to see if our application had arrived. Well the it finally arrived....and holy crap it had scary stuff in it! They are very honest about the mission we are about to embark in. It's all good, but man alive, it has the power to stop superman dead in flight!

The fear became so strong, that I personally found it much more comforting to hide it under a pile of mail. Every few days I would acknowledge the packet was there... But then the fear would creep up again and I would choose to add more mail to the pile...

Finally on thanksgiving morning started to fill out our  application. With each question it asked, the fear started climbing higher and higher. By the time it got to the real serious questions , the application found itself promptly hiding under a pile of mail and me running as fast as I could to the Turkey. 

Well this Sunday we had a pivotal moment. I dragged my sick carcus to church, because I had too many things to do that morning. The service topic was on the infamous story of Abraham and Issac. The age old story of God asking Abraham to do the impossible task of sacrificing his son. 

Yet the part that hit me right between the eyes was this phrase.

So fear was causing me to delay in something I felt  God  has been working In my life since I was a teen.  So at last I went home and WE started working on the application. 

The next morning I sealed her up with a couple of photos of us and I took the walk to the mail box.

There I stood. No exaggeration I stood there for about a minute frozen looking like this...

And with the confidence of a church mouse , I placed the application in the box. Such a tiny act, but so much weight. We did it. We took the very first big step. I know that in reality it's actually going to be a small step in the next year or so process, but for now it seems like a very big deal to me.

So now I sit here as we wait for the next step. 

No different then any other expectant parent , just anxious to see what's next. Partially excited and mostly trying not to pee our pants in the unknown!